When I was in college my friend Anne was always gushing about some guy who apparently had “The most amazing touch.” I remember thinking to myself, “Who cares? Why is that important? Why should I care about having amazing touch with women?”
But I couldn’t deny the fact that this beautiful, sensual woman continued to speak of how great this guy’s “touch” was over and over again. Clearly there was something to this. It took me years to really understand what she was talking about.
These days it’s just plain clear to me how much a man’s touch conveys about him.
It instantly communicates how comfortable, solid and confident you are with yourself and with her. It also immediately gives her a sense of what it would be like to be in bed with you.
Imagine a giant Redwood tree. The roots extend deep, deep into the ground. The trunk is thick and immovable. If you were to go up and lean against it you would immediately feel its strength.
Now imagine that there are two ropes hanging from a branch that connect to a wooden swing. When you sit on the seat and swing through the air you can feel the unflinching solidness of the tree holding you.
Yeah, feels good. Solid.
Now imagine that they tree has no roots at all. The base of it is simply resting flat on the ground. When you swing you can feel the shaky vibrations of your movement rippling through the entire tree. Why? Because, technically speaking, the tree is not “grounded.”
Can you still relax and enjoy the swing?
Not a chance.
Why? Because it’s NOT the feeling of solid, grounded and strong that you expect. You can’t fully trust that it’s not going to topple over. In truth, it feels disappointing because you can’t trust it.
Women feel this way with men A LOT.
They expect us to be strong, grounded and solid.
But what they often get from a man is tense, weak or anxious.
And because of this they can’t fully relax.
That’s why women are so thrilled (like Anne was) when a man could actually give her that feeling of gentle strength.
When you touch a woman and all your attention is in your body or in your head, women can tell. They’re sensitive enough to be able to feel if you are “grounded” or not, just as you could tell if the tree was grounded or not.
So here is what you do. Become highly aware of your lower body, your balls, legs and feet. Do it right now. Seriously. Take a minute to stand up and try it.
While you’re standing become super aware of your balls, legs and feet.
It allows your body to settle and feel more relaxed and stable. That is where to have your attention while touching her.
Now, imagine roots extending down through your feet into the earth and holding you steady. This has your body relax even more and increases the feeling of solidness that women pick up on.
When you do this and you touch a woman, imagine that your hand is connected all the way down through your body to the roots that go deep into the earth. This lets your hand feel soft, strong, relaxed and powerful when you touch her (as opposed to tense, weak and anxious).
This is super easy to practice. Just do it every time you shake anyone’s hand.
It may help to flex your calf muscles when you do just to quickly help you instantly feel the lower part of your body.
When you do this the quality of your physical touch feels different. It feels more relaxed, more sure of itself and more comfortable. Becoming a master of having amazing touch with women and creating turn-on with women is a result of making lots of little shifts and adjustments like this.
Give it a practice and see for yourself.
Relax, you got this.
P.S. You really can do this. You can be the man that women gush over. And it doesn’t matter how old you are, how much money you have, how much experience you have or what you look like. The high self-esteem women (the ones you want) care more about how a man makes them feel than most anything else.